I hate it. I really do.
{Yeah. I wish my bathroom looked like this. Or do I? Not sure. But I like it.}
I can't stand baths.
I know I've probably said it a kazillion times on this thing, but really. Can't stand them. In my past life, I was definitely a land dweller. A cat. {We'll go with cheetah.} People always make the idea of a bath look all sexy and stuff. And by stuff I mean relaxing. So I try that. I can't pull it off. I view myself as the opposite of sexy. And relaxing. The unfortunate/permanent side effect of becoming a mom. I guess that leaves me with unappealing and high strung.
Score.
Picture me with a shower cap + back scrubber. Let's be productive here. My idea of a bath.
I took one last night. I thought it would be quite relaxing after such a long day. Soak. In the tub. Bludgeoning bod=weightless. 'I can move past my notions of soaking it up in the nasties,' I thought, as I lowered myself gingerly into my garden sized tub and optimistically mixed the warm water with some aromatics. After five minutes I was wishing for a plasma tv or access to the internet. At least a handy rack where I could check out a magazine. Stupid pointless bath.
I refuse to wash my own dishes in standing water. The idea of something sitting in its own filth completely repulses me. So, I'm much less compelled to soak in my own wee beasties, until I shrivel into a prune. Not to mention I may suffer from a seizure with the candles around me flickering my eyesight to death. They seem to go into strobe mode and it totally throws me off. I'm a panicky mess grasping for towels and some kind of a steel arm assistant to get me out of there until I can regain some composure. I couldn't wash my hair...My belly poked out over the water, and I figured none of this was really counting, as I did some sort of an awkward not so all immersed bob in between dry and wet. Shouldn't I soak all at once? Aren't I breaking the sacred bath time rules?
You think garden sized would be large enough for me. It's not. It's awkward. There's no real place to gently lower my head without my belly dragging me down so I can pull a paralyzed Michelle Phieffer via What Lies Beneath, urgently pulling at the drain with my feet while the nostrils slowly gurgle in rising water. Not pretty. Should I fold my knees or straighten them out so I can prop them over the edge? That position usually results in a numbed butt and I really didn't want to call for Jamin's help in getting OUT of the tub...Yeah. NOT sexy. Might as well put on my nightgown afterwards. Permanently.
He probably ventures to work every day and talks about "what his fat wife did THIS time." Didn't want to add to his collection.
I made a few bubble sculptures with a few discernable shapes. I grew tired of the not-so-productive OR relaxing situation, surrendered to the inevietable, and escaped into the shower. I've concluded if I'm this stressed over a bath, that translates into an honest need for a FULL day at the SPA.
I'm booking tomorrow. Thanks, Jamin.
Here's your four for one deal this week in supabloggablogginworld: {Yeah, I didn't have it in me to do it twice...and I REALLY REALLY NEED YOUR HELP SO KEEP READING!!!}
{Image source: You guessed it: DOMINO. Yeah I'm the dork who just won't move on...}
a seamstress' call forhelp
visions of summer are dancing in myhead...
prima ballerinaII
I totally also have a fun new page where I now store stuff because I closed down my etsy store. HURRAY!!!
Supa Blogga Supreme Mama
in bathtime, family, pregnancy, struggles, whiney blog
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Our large, jet-spray, bathtub is completely pointless. I refuse to soak in it, I detest the thought of even dipping a toe into the warm water. I HATE the thought of soaking in dirty water. Our bathtub sometimes is a storage bin, sometimes a tub for the girls, sometimes a great white porcelon tub, but never, ever used as a cleaning device for me. NEVER. I also never wash my dishes by using a sinkful of water. Call me "non-green" but I prefer to have running water and a scrubber full of soap to clean my pots and pans. This comment is rambling and makes no sense, but I totally agree with your way of thinking. Oh, and your princess is lovely!
Roll over and enjoy the sensation of being on your stomach for a moment, that's why I take baths when preggers!
I ask this sheepishly because I know that you have shut down the etsy shop. I was planning on doing a bird/ birdcage room if I have a little girl, but I won't find out until June 8th. I was hoping to order a couple of your prints (some of the tweet, tweets) to frame and hang in the nursery. Will I be able to? I know you are on hiatus so if you say no I will COMPLETELY understand.
Kate-yeah, if you don't mind waiting a few months...I don't mind fulfilling an order at all, you are too sweet to think of me. ;) I put my slideshow thingy on here because I hate to just lose it all to vacay mode, when I will still be able to fulfill an occasional order.
My printer broke down last week (and subsequently screwed me over, since it is supposed to take around 600 to fix...) needless to say I'm a little irked. So, I am taking it all in stride, and looking for a cheaper solution in the meantime. I will keep you updated when you are ready, as far as options go, if that's okay!
But no, I don't mind fulfilling an order at all, as long as you give me a little time. Just let me know.
You wanna come swimming at my house? I bet you'd fit in the pool here. When I was pregnant with Liam I spent all of June, July and August in the swimming pool. Constant floating was the ONLY comfortable position I could find.
"Should I fold my knees or straighten them out so I can prop them over the edge? That position usually results in a numbed butt and I really didn't want to call for Jamin's help in getting OUT of the tub...Yeah. NOT sexy. Might as well put on my nightgown afterwards. Permanently" = Such a hilarious image! I love how your writing puts it's reader in the room where you are!
We have a huge tub with jets that in 5 years we have filled... once. It took FOREVER to fill and by the time the bath was ready, I was like 4 tasks past bath. I've decided I can only be a bath-taker when baths are prepared for me. So until we get a maid specifically assigned to drawing baths, that confines my bath-taking to early childhood.
I am so sorry to hear about your printer. That really sucks. I am in the same boat (sort of,) my sewing machine died and I am currently using my sister-in-law's really cheap, really bad one. I need to upgrade sorely but just can't afford to. It is soooo frustrating!
I didn't know you felt this way...I am the same way! I love the thought of a long, relaxing bubblebath. And then it takes forever to fill the tub. I always make the water too hot. When it's finally cooled off enough, or I make myself get in despite the burning flesh, I get bored in like 2 minutes. I'm like you - if I had a TV or a rack for looking at a mag or reading a book, I'd probably be ok. But it's usually not worth it for me. I'm so glad I'm not the only one who feels this way! I thought I was the only female who didn't like baths. {BTW, I never use them to get clean...that grosses me out too!}
Here is one way to fix your bath problem... do what I did and get your husband to put a tv in your bathroom. Now I can watch my shows while I soak with my jets on. Now, that relaxes me! Also, it is nice when I am getting ready because I can catch the weather or whatever is on at the time.
Okay, I just read the post below and then this one. I'm with you on the bath. I'm not much of a fan except when I was pregnant. I promise, promise, promise that taking bath soaks in Epsom salts will keep the swelling down and keep away the aches. I learned this after my first pregnancy. The second one, every time I began to ache, I would take one and I felt great until the very end. Well, except the indigestion. It does nothing for that. With the first, I had to stop wearing my rings at five months. With the second, I took them off the night before I went into the hospital. I swear by it. Does wonders. Definitely requires a rinse in the shower afterwards but totally worth it.
so...exactly how filthy are you when you are taking these baths? maybe consider showering more regularly...