I have to agree with your brother. You do not know where people's shoes have been (that goes for purses too by the way ladies). I think it is perfectly ok to ask someone to slip their shoes at the door. The way I think of it is everyone has house rules...some are odd and some are normal. Eventually people get use to it and it just becomes a habit when they come to your home. I've had this same struggle--I feel like I work so hard to keep everything clean and then the whole place can be destroyed in a matter of mere seconds. If I had little ones crawling around in the back of my head I would always be thinking about what your brother said and I would have to make people take off their shoes by the door.
Sometimes I wonder if the people that do not want to take off their shoes have smelly feet :), mis-matched socks, holey socks or just in need of a pedicure. All those are silly excuses and we have all been there.

It only took what a year for both of us to brake down and blog about this. :) I've decided I'm going to set up a cute basket by our front door somehow and put a pair of shoes in it (you know to get the idea rolling) and hope people notice and join in. I understand both sides of the coin but literally cringe when I see people in shoes inside - no matter who's house it is.

I think that it is your house to treat as you wish. I do not allow people to smoke inside my home (even when I was a smoker, I didn't smoke inside,) and I don't see the shoe issue as anything different. Both your brother and Decorno make fine points; a little extreme either way for me. In a time when everything seems to be meaningless and disposable, it's kind of nice knowing that someone takes pride in their things and want to take care of them. After all, everything we have is only on loan from the Father.

Maybe you could have a little basket with soft slippers and/or fluffy socks for those who have hammer toes....or at least unpainted ones! :)

......And that certainly doesn't mean that people who wear shoes inside the house don't take care of what they have.......

Growing up we had a no shoes allowed in the house policy. Whenever I invited friends over, I was the one at the door telling them politely to remove their shoes. Of course we always ran into the "I just put on my lace up shoes to go outside and realized that I need to go potty. Can I just hurry across the floor with my shoes on?" scenarios. I somehow survived and so did all of my friends. To this day, we still remove our shoes when we visit my parents.

At our house, we really only put on our shoes when we are leaving. I'm not as extreme as my parents. I will walk through the house with my shoes on and if I am staying, I remove them.

I've recently found a new friend and she has a "shoes off" policy. She has never come out and told me this, but I was able to pick up quickly on the clues. Her entire family removes their shoes when they enter our house and I never see them wearing shoes in theirs. When we go over, my entire family takes off their shoes now.

Whenever we would have a lot of company over growing up, the no shoes policy had to go out the window. I don't think that my parents would ever be able to get an entire crowd to cooperate with their rule. Once everyone left, we all had our fair share of cleaning to do.

I bet that you could make some kind of sign to hang outside your front door to let your visitors know that they are welcome to come in, but you'd rather their shoes not. I don't think that having this rule is offensive at all!

I don't wear shoes at my house just because it's more comfortable!

Just to play devil's advocate: I understand that shoes track in dirt, grime, and other gross things, but I've also heard that the oils in your feet (who knows if that seeps through socks or not, but think about people's sweaty feet) actually is more detrimental to your carpet than grime. Apparently the oil gets down too deep into the fibers and even stains it, instead of being removed when cleaned.

I'm sorry if I haven't taken my shoes off when I come over! I'll be very careful from now on! :)

I understand both sides, but I've always worried that someone might ask me to take off my shoes and me not realizing I would have to do this would have on socks with big holes in the toes, or have on slip on shoes and my feet would let out this horrific odor when I take them off or have horribly pedicured toes. That would be my biggest worry. Also, I am a short person and I like my boots with heals or shoes that give me some height and when I take them off, I feel so short and dumpy. That's just my two cents. I understand both sides.

ha...i remember going to walt's house in auburn and having to take our shoes off at the door! he'd have a big group over and all the shoes were lined up by the door! it was just "normal" for their house, so it was no big deal.

i don't have a strong preference either way. prob b/c we mainly have tile floors, so they're easier to clean. but...i am reminded of some cultural training we did for our LST mission trips...and watching out for shoes by the door was a big one b/c leaving shoes on was a MAJOR insult in different cultures. i think the same could be said for individual homes...it's your house, your "culture" if you will, so you make the rules that set the norm. but the idea of at least giving clues or signs makes it a little easier for visitors to realize your "culture" without you having to call them out right when they walk in. wow...i guess i did have an opinion...haha!

haha! Jamey, PLEASE do not take your shoes off when you come over!!! like I said, I gave up on that a long time ago, to the point where I don't let it bother me, because it IS offensive to some people to ask them to do that. This is why I almost didn't post this, because now people will be paranoid about coming to my house! I have resigned not to make a stink about it. I take my own shoes off, but when lots of people come over, I refuse to stress about it and play shoe police.

I'm way more concerned with those who aren't washing their hands after using the restroom than I am about where shoes have been. As long as you have a crawler in your house though, I think it's fine to say, "She still crawls and puts stuff in her mouth..." Once all your kids are upright, that has to go. We are a barefoot household, because we are so casual, but I'm always thankful that no one asks Bert to take off his shoes... shoo-wee!

i am laughing because i cannot even get my own family to take their shoes off, much less the myriad of people that come stamping through my home on a daily basis. ideally i would love it if the majority took off their shoes, but i do not ask.

somehow my sister in law has it that no one crosses her threshold without voluntarily shedding their shoes. it is like some kinda black magic. and on the whole 'gross things on your feet' point...you might have to make everyone coming in wash their hands too to avoid the 'fecal oral pathway'. i have always wanted to write that in a sentence.

I am like anonymous. If someone asked me to take off my shoes and I was not prepared, I would probably be wearing socks with big holes in it or have stinky feet. Also, I frequently wear socks that do not match with boots because I know no one will see them.

For me personally, the rule is silly. But I do understand why others would prefer it. I don't mind taking my shoes off at someone else's house if they want me to. The only time I mind is when I'm wearing my tall boots & the zipper goes up to the knee & I have to balance on one foot while I hike my pants leg up to unzip the thing & then I lose my balance & fall over. (Ok so that's never actually happened to me.) But, it's a small price to pay for the hospitality offered by the homeowner! It's your house, so you can have whatever rules you want with it. I guess to sum up, I would say "to each his own". :-)

I consider myself a fairly observant person, but Geez-Louise I've never heard of this phenomenon before! Except in China and places like that. I always take mine off just because it's more comfortable if I'm going to be in for a while. I always make my kids take them off and put them in their "shoe baskets" in their closets as soon as we get in, just so that they won't lose them. I understand where you're coming from though, babies crawling around on germ-y floors does make me cringe a little. But for mine, I was just trying to keep their POOP in their diaper & not in their mouths! ;) Building up their immune system and all! :) ha

I have been striving to keep a cleaner house, I pray for a little OCD to come my way - but this just shatters all hope I had that I was doing a better job. Oh well.

And my socks almost never match, I'm sure I would be embarrassed if asked to take my shoes off before this post. Now I know to at least wear nice matchy-matchy socks (with no holes - that narrows down my choices a lot) to someones house just in case. :) You crack me up Supa!

oh kelli. i usually am ocd. but if you could see my house right this minute...its the travesty of what two kids and morning sicknesss will do to you. EMBARRASSING. and while we're on the subject matter, its officially hilarious that I'm worried about shoes when my STUPID dog left a trail of VOMIT spanning the width of our living room today. If the neighbors heard me scream, they would have called the police. When I told Jamin what happened, he was all, is she okay? My response? seriously? you're asking if the DUMMY DOG is okay, and I'm the one with morning sickness cleaning up DOG VOMIT on TOP of poopy diapers??? I DON'T CARE!!! We made up, but she's been in her crate for the rest of the day, voluntarily hiding from me...

good story. Guess that puts it all into perspective! I officially no longer care.

Ok, so yes I am the one married to the OCD brother. That being said, when we first started dating, I found the whole take your shoes off thing at the door TOTALLY out of left field, and yes almost rude. But rude in a different way. I looked at shoes off as a sign of me feeling comforatable enough in your home to start shedding clothes and get down to my socks. It was really odd feeling that way when I first met Mr. and Mrs. Malone. I wanted to be respectful, yet I knew I needed to strip down to my socks right off the bat! It was a weird feeling for me.

Now, however, I am married to the no shoes man and it has been a well established rule in our house. The germs play a huge role in that as well as the "scratches on the hardwood floors from people's shoes." I must admit, if I didn't live with Walt the rule probably wouldn't exist. However, it is important to him, so I have become used to it.

Laura- it is hard to balance on one leg while shedding my boots EVERY SINGLE DAY. However, at the end of the day we have a cleaner house from it and our friends don't seem to have an issue with it at all. Walt has a way of making it seem funny, yet a serious request all at the same time.

So am I for it or against it? I'm fine either way. But when you come to our house, you will without a doubt politely be asked to remove your germ carrying shoes.

haha Cristin! Yeah. I'm still torn!

I would like to take this moment to point out that I always take my shoes off at your house.. :) It's the Northerner in me.

Wow. And here I was thinking you were all my twin and everything. Our lives are identical in nearly every way... I always assumed you lived in a sticky house like me. I'm always surprised when I discover that some women with toddlers are obsessively clean. I've actually wondered before if they really exist, or if they are urban legend. I've never been OCD about things, but pre-kids, I was impeccably clean. The cleanest of all my roommates and suitemates by far. As a mom, I have completely surrendered to the stickies. The shoe thing would never have even entered my mind. It's the least of my worries. I think if you didn't grow up with the tradition of taking your shoes off, it just would never in a million years cross our minds to do so. It's not that we think you're rude... it's just that we feel stupid and rude when we realize your rule. The only home I've ever been to where I was asked to remove my shoes was my grandpa's in Hawaii (Seriously, though, to call him a stranger would be too intimate a term. Don't really know the man at all. He left with his Japanese girlfriend when my mom was 12). I guess I should have expected it with all that Japanese influence, but it just never crossed my mind. So I hobbled in his 12-inch by 12-inch square foot of a foyer and awkwardly attempted to remove my New Balance (which were pretty much glued to my feet having been on them the entire 10+ hour flight) whilst my deadbeat grandpa and his 3rd wife in her kimono looked on. One of the most awkward moments of my life. But no, I don't think it's rude to ask. Just understand that we're not offended as much as flustered and embarrassed. Oh, and your bigggest obstacle to the shoe rule may be Emerson in a few months... most toddler girls develop a major shoe fetish. The first words I hear over Anna Kate's baby monitor each morning are, "Shoes... shoes...shoes." When I come in her nursery, I'm no longer greeted with exclamations of "Mommy!" Instead she immediately points to the armoire, which she wants me to open so she can point and fuss for the particular pair she wants to wear. They go on over her footed jammies if they have to. So... good luck with that if Emmy develops the same fascination!

Oh, and in reference to Jamey's comment about the oils in your feet... Michael's whole family NEVER goes barefoot in the house. My MIL is the most OCD clean person I know, and she wakes up every morning and puts on her Keds first thing. I think bare feet are grosser to most people than socks and shoes. I would be totally grossed out to have people's bare feet on the carpet where my babies crawl... especially if they just took of a pair of shoes and their feet have that stank to them. Athlete's foot, boils, bunions, ewwwwww... please give me some fresh dirt instead! Not trying to argue your fine rule... just taking you up on your request to let you know where we're coming from.

If you combine my last two comments and throw this one in for good measure, it may just equal your longest blog comment EVER.

Paragraphs, hannah. paragraphs!! ;) I'm sorry about the dead beat grandpa. I laughed out loud. For the sake of argument, just so you know I'm not ocd, we had Emmy's first bday party here on Saturday, and I begged people to keep their shoes on. As I said, I'm not going to ask people to do that. AND OH MY GOSH IF YOU COULD SEE MY HOUSE RIGHT NOW...you would fall over laughing. I promise its not sterile!!! In my prego stupor I have currently surrendered to the gook. sad but true.

You're always welcome to move to Canada. Up here it would be considered rude NOT to take your shoes off. Unless the homeowner gave you a, 'Oh don't worry, keep your shoes on' it wouldn't even cross our minds to be shod inside. :)

wow. I'm loving reading this blog. I really don't mind when people ask me to take off my shoes. However, it is a little sad b/c I LOVE shoes and usually there is a whole ensemble going on.
But, it is your house and you have every right to make any and all requests.
And I totally don't blame the blogger with the Louboutins. If I was wearing $700 shoes, I probably wouldn't want to leave them at the door.